Lately I have been very
impatient. Well…let me rephrase that:
I’ve always been impatient. Impatient for summer to come and for school
to be done, impatient for Christmas, impatient for a really great vacation,
impatient for my food when I’m eating at a restaurant, impatient while I’m standing
in line waiting to have my items checked out…you get the point. Currently this
impatience has been all about my eminent “adult future,” finding a job and
getting married. Those two things have
been at the top of my list of both excitements and anxieties.
In regards to finding a job, it gets
depressing when all I do is search and search for a job and then go to an
interview or get declined before even having a chance for an interview. Not even getting an interview happens much
more frequently and is really discouraging.
It makes me feel worthless. I
want to get a job where I am appreciated and feel like I’m making a difference,
as well as enjoying it in the process.
This is my ideal job. The problem
is that I don’t know exactly what job this would be and as soon as I find a job
that I think would be perfect for me, I get denied. So, the cycle continues.
In
regards to marriage, I’ve always dreamed of finding my prince and having a
fairy tale wedding. So, now that I’ve
found my prince, I’m impatient to tie the knot and have my fairy tale come
true. I have a Pinterest board full of
ideas for the wedding, and my mom and I have already been talking about where
to have the wedding and the reception. I
feel a little bad about how antsy I am, but at the same time, I really
don’t…because the anticipation and dreaming is the best part. Once the dream is achieved, then it’s
over. Sure, you have the memories of it,
but the challenge and the anticipation of the unexpected is gone. The unexpected can be scary, but mostly it’s
beautiful and thrilling.
The future is something to
speculate and dream about, but the beauty of it all is that you can never
completely predict it. The brides on the
show Bridezillas would have a
different opinion of this, and instead want everything to go exactly as planned,
but in the end what fun is that? If
everything goes exactly as planned, there are no surprises. Sure, some surprises can be unpleasant (such
as the florist forgetting to order the flowers or the bride falling into a
fountain and ruining her dress), but most times these moments are what makes
the event so memorable and unique. I’m
not saying that I want these unpleasant things to happen to me on my wedding
day, of course. What I’m trying to say
is that I want to embrace whatever happens with a smile on my face. And not just my wedding…but my whole
future. Because I have faith that even
though there will certainly be some unhappy moments in my future, the happy
moments will completely outnumber them and the unexpected can be expected. So, bring it on! The future is bright.
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