A Reflection on Sex

 

Sex: such a loaded word with so many different connotations.  Mostly it is seen as dirty, animalistic, and a taboo table conversation…not something you’d discuss with your grandmother over Thanksgiving dinner for instance.  But it can also be seen in a pure and compassionate way, as a deeply physical and emotional connection with a profound soul-touching power as well as a miraculous life-giving power.  The latter is how I view sex, but it wasn’t how I’d always viewed it.  Before I’d fallen in love and had a sexual relationship for the first time, I thought sex was dirty and impure and looked very painful.  I was convinced that I would never have sex and that even if I did, that I wouldn’t enjoy it and wouldn’t do it often.  Falling in love, however, has changed everything.

Who would’ve thought something as carnal and physical could be so pure and spiritual simultaneously?  Maybe it’s just me, but sex is more than just physical desire and instinct.  If it’s done with someone you love and trust (not just a random hook-up), sex can be extremely emotional and spiritual.  The act of having sex is a major display of trust.  There are so many things that could go wrong when it comes to sex…the woman could get pregnant, STDs could be transmitted, and rape could occur.  That’s why trust is so important when it comes to sex. 

If you can’t trust your partner with all your heart, then you aren’t truly ready for sex.  Your body may be saying “let’s go,” but your heart is saying “no.”  Trust your heart.  Putting yourself out there, displaying and giving up your whole body to another person is a major decision, and when you decide to do this with the right person—someone you love and trust completely—then this really strengthens your relationship and adds a whole new dimension of connection.

The first time I had sex probably wouldn’t be considered very spiritual…more so awkward…but, with time and practice, trust steadily built even more and with this complete trust came a freedom I’d never felt before…a freedom to be exactly who I am, no hiding, and to be completely certain of who I wanted and loved unconditionally: my lover. 

The part I find most amazing about sex is the connection between sex’s physical, instinctual connection and the intangible, spiritual connection of souls.  Through a physical connection of two bodies, a spiritual connection occurs right along with it.  It’s such a blessed and wondrous feeling to begin to know a person both inside and out, soul and body.  As I learned—and continue to learn— more and more about my lover, the more I love him and the more beautiful he becomes.  It’s so indescribable, so unconditional.  Sex isn’t everything, but it is a gateway to the soul once you trust your partner enough to meet “where soul meets body.”